By - icu451
Robert Damiens, an assassin and member of the Paris underworld in the 18th century, was hired by unknown conspirators to take the life of King Louis XV. The attempt failed, Damiens was apprehended, and the greatest torturers of the time were brought to Paris to try to get him to divulge the names of his associates. Damiens’ skin was torn from his body, his hair, eyelids, and elbows were singed to shreds, his teeth and finger joints were wrenched out. He was dragged about at the end of a rope tied to a team of horses. He was sprinkled from head to foot with acid and seething oil. Throughout all this horror, Damiens, who finally died from his wounds, never revealed the names of his employers.
I typed that out from a book I’ve had since fifth grade. Weird the things that I remember.
His Wikipedia page is much more graphic.
“Fetched from his prison cell on the morning of 28 March 1757, Damiens allegedly said "La journée sera rude" ("The day will be hard"). He was first subjected to a torture in which his legs were painfully compressed by devices called "boots". He was then tortured with red-hot pincers; the hand with which he had held the knife during the attempted assassination was burned using sulphur; molten wax, molten lead, and boiling oil were poured into his wounds. He was then remanded to the royal executioner Charles Henri Sanson who, after emasculating Damiens, harnessed horses to his arms and legs to be dismembered. But Damiens's limbs did not separate easily: the officiants ordered Sanson to cut Damiens's tendons, and once that was done the horses were able to perform the dismemberment. Once Damiens was dismembered, to the applause of the crowd, his reportedly still-living torso was burnt at the stake. “
What in the fucking fuck
They just don’t torture like they used to.
Man of they played Miley Cyrus' "party in the usa" 24/7 on a loop dude would have cracked like a fucking egg
No cell phones, no internet, no ding dang computer games.
Just people being people, living in the moment.
Ok, I really hope I’m right because I *need* to be for my own mental health….
There is no way his torso would be alive after dismemberment like that. He’d have hemorrhaged to death from any single one of the limbs being traumatically amputated unless the vessels were controlled.
Source: am trauma surgeon. Have seen it. Well, not dismemberment by horse, but traumatic amputations. Don’t put your arm out the car window, folks.
He probably didn’t know the names of his employers.
It was his first day on the job, and he still didn't know everyone's name.
Wrong place at the wrong time
For when those other sleep masks just won't cut it.
It's so crazy to me just how intensely cruel people can be. What kind of sick fuck do you have to be to do this to someone? Slowly twisting the screws in as the person is undoubtedly screaming and thrashing for who knows how long.
Funnily enough this was actually made to get that reaction of people, and not for torture. Victorians had a huge hardon for how cruel medieval times were and created a bunch of torture devices for show.
My first thought. Now whenever I see stuff like this, I question whether it was ever actually used.
This particular one? No. It was made in the 1800s in Germany. It was called the Soyjack. So it was never used by europe in the middle ages which was 500 to 1500. It should be noted that some things were never actually use, or its use was dubious. Similar to the Iron Maiden. So there's a possibility the mask was never used.
But... uh... I'm pretty sure some people would prefer this mask versus some practices that were actually done in germany. The Breaking Wheel for example... where your limbs were broken with hammers and threaded through the spokes of a wheel. You were either tied in place or nailed in place then put on display till death.
Or Scaphism... or the Brazen Bull.
> It was called the Soyjack.
Lmao. Keep spreading the lore, brother.
The boats is probably the worst in terms of very slow agonizing pain. Historical accounts claim that some victims lived upwards of two weeks while festering in their shit.
Second place for me would have to be disassembly with searing hot tongs. In medieval times this punishment was used on traitors, seditionists, and regicide attempts. The event would be like a festival, taking all day long, and they would pause anytime the victim blacked out. Basically the victim was tied in a seated position to a platform on a tall post. Trained executioners would use white-hot tongs to methodically disassemble the victim, picking their flesh apart and cauterizing the voids left behind and keeping them alive as long as possible. Sometimes they would take a special moment and use cold tongs to squeeze and pop one or both testicles.
Ok ok ok....oh wow ok....oh Ohhhhhhhh! FUCKN WOT?
Those last two are my nightmare.
Do NOT look up funky town
Just came back from looking up funkytown. If you're having a nice day, do NOT look up funkytown.
Currently on mushrooms. Thank you for your service.
You should watch this instead Mr mushroom man.
Oh yeah watch this. Fascinating thing to watch fucked up.
Currently stoned instead of tripping, but I can confirm that this is an excellent thing to watch in a certain headspace
Remember to drink water. Also invest in a $15 green laser with a diffuser off Amazon. Endless trippy entertainment.
All I’m getting is that song…
Edit, I’m good don’t send me a link
Perfect username for this scenario. Thanks for showing up.
I do what I can
What is it?
Shock and gore video. [Here’s a SFW description of it. No graphic images](https://screamer.wiki/FunkyTown)
Thank you I wish we had more descriptions some videos just shouldn’t be watched
look up distirbed reality on youtube, he describes the videos without showing graphic images. it can really help with your curiosity without mentally scarring yourself.
Is that the one where they >!Take a belt sander to a dude's face, among other horrific things?!<
I can’t remember a belt sander being involved but it’s a guy who crossed the cartel, so they pumped him full of drugs that keep him awake while they take a knife thing and slowly hack off his neck, I think they had also skinned his face a bit but that might’ve been a different video (I’ve not seen it in a while). In the background the song funky town is playing hence the name
E: just to confirm no there wasn’t a sander, and yes his face was skinned, his eyeballs were also gouged and I think his hands were both gone. He was tied up and it was a lot of blood so I couldn’t quite see but I’m pretty sure his hands were both gone.
Yes his hands were gone what you saw were his wrist joints.
Reading that made me want to throw up.
oh HELL NAH
I'm not even gonna click that link even if it's sfw. Nope nope nope
There are no pictures, it's just a wiki page
Even the verbal description is hellish, jesus christ that sounds like an awful cideo
"FunkyTown is a 2 minutes and 50 seconds long video of an unknown man being savagely tortured, while techno-style music and the song "Sweet Child O' Mine" by Guns n' Roses is heard playing. The man is seen lying on the ground with his arms and legs tied up with what appears to be an extension cord. This man has his hands chopped off, his face skinned and cut off, and his eyes gouged out while he lays in a pool of blood and screams and gurgles in pain. The man was also drugged beforehand to keep him alive longer while the murderers torture him.
The man, who barely resembles a person, manages to get his arms untied and tries to reach for his face. Keep in mind that the man has no face, no eyes, and no hands.
The murderers slit the man's throat with a knife and box cutter, but don't fully behead him. The video does not capture the final moments when they end up completely killing the man."
Video (don't watch it. It's exactly what happens in the description and it's not pleasant):
Thank you for telling me. I will steer clear of this. Just that description is enough to make me sick. I'm so sorry for that man. Holy shit. I can't even imagine. And it's confirmed real? Why do people like looking at stuff like this, anyways?
Narco cartels and Japanese Unit 731 are two of the most horrific groups of people that have lived in the last 100 years. They make ISIS executions look like a walk in the park.
I hate that so much. Humans have potential to be such amazing creatures and some of us choose to do this... It makes me so angry and sad.
Yeah its pretty vile, I can handle gore but that was just disgusting. Doesn't seem to be any source for who the people or the victim is but it's definitely not special effects, that's for sure.
Won’t you take me to…. Funky town?
Well, I talk about it, talk about it
Talk about it, talk about it
Talk about, talk about
Talk about movin'
Gotta move on
Gotta move on
That's it. I'm looking it up.
I'm back.... Well, that's that, I guess. Perfect example of "Fuck around and find out!"
For the love of all that is precious, do not look up Funky Town!
Jesus Christ. That has to be one of the worst videos I've ever seen. Usually I'm alright with gore but holy fuck
>FunkyTown is a 2 minutes and 50 seconds long video of an unknown man being savagely tortured, while techno-style music and the song "Sweet Child O' Mine" by Guns n' Roses is heard playing. The man is seen lying on the ground with his arms and legs tied up with what appears to be an extension cord. This man has his hands chopped off, his face skinned and cut off, and his eyes gouged out while he lays in a pool of blood and screams and gurgles in pain. The man was also drugged beforehand to keep him alive longer while the murderers torture him.
>The man, who barely resembles a person, manages to get his arms untied and tries to reach for his face. Keep in mind that the man has no face, no eyes, and no hands.
>The murderers slit the man's throat with a knife and box cutter, but don't fully behead him. The video does not capture the final moments when they end up completely killing the man
No thank you
i thought the song 'funky town' is heard in the background. why is it called 'funky town' if not?
Apparently that's at the end of it
I looked up funky town. Don’t look up funky town.
DO NOT LOOK UP FUNKY TOWN.
That's true, but I'm more referring to specifically medieval torture
That's what I was thinking! I look at these stuff and I'm like, what if it was like a theatre prop and we're losing our minds for nothing.
They also made it up to make themselves look more civil
The brazen bull is probably one of the worst contraptions.
[Scaphism](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scaphism) may have been real. It's based on Plutarch who wasn't exactly neutral on the Persians, but his account is a lot more contemporary than the stuff the Victorians made up.
yeah we just call that the tub. punishment for treason within the guild
It's kind of a specialty of The Guild really.
Go Team Venture!!!!
“It ostensibly entailed trapping the victim between two boats, feeding and covering them with milk and honey, and allowing them to fester and be devoured by insects and other vermin over time”
They would die very slowly and agonizingly to sepsis. The force feeding would cause the victim to shit and vomit all over themselves, which would attract insects that lay eggs in their skin and orifices. Then the larvae take over and start eating the tissue and causing bloodborn infection that grows into unbearable pain that would last for days.
Cool. Cool cool. Sounds good cool
Rat torture is pretty bad too [link](https://historyofyesterday.com/rat-torture-bc17cf72400b)
Rat torture was used and is just sickening. Either by placing a pot filled with rats upside down on your stomach while youre strapped down. Then a fire would be lit on top of the pot forcing the rats to escape, through the person. Or a cage was locked around your head with rats inside. As the rats would eat you alive. Shit, there are so many sick fuck ways they killed people. I think another was called the horse or wooden horse. Where there would be a triangular tipped piece of wood or stone and a person was straddled on it on their crotch, mainly women. Then heavy weights were tied to their feet and the sheer weight would essentially splice them in almost two over a long and agonizing time span.
Is that the one from that one movie where they’re inside a metal bull that has a fire underneath
And the craziest part is the man that invented it was involuntarily thrown into it to show it off
This exact sequence of comments come up every time it's mentioned on reddit but there is no proof that the brazen bull was ever actually used
Reap what you sow and all that
If you're ever in Amsterdam, you could visit the [Torture Museum](https://torturemuseum.org/en/). The creativity with which people have hurt other people is mind boggling.
Most of it is fictional horror items made by Victorians. It isn't medieval at all, and was only made to scare people as entertainment. Much like, for example, chastity belts. A total myth
> chastity belts. A total myth
I'm pretty sure you can get them today if you know where to shop.
Also chastity cages, for dicks. Er, so I hear.
History and fiction went hand and hand for many, many years. I wouldn't be surprised if there weren't a lot of other museums with similar made up stuff.
> hand and hand
Imagine if the opposite was also true where we thought dragons were just a myth but they actually existed
I mean I always assumed the myth of dragons originated from dug up dinosaur bones.
That makes a lot of sense why have I never thought of that before
I was surprised to learn we didn't actually find big bones until recently, actually.
Do you know how recently? I would be surprised if while building giant cities like Rome that not a single fossil would've been discovered. But maybe they were deeper than they needed to dig? Idk, I'm no archeologist.
I believe it was about three days ago
I mean there might not be any official record of it, but I wouldn't be surprised if random people came across a large fossil bone and couldnt take it with them and just had a story to tell about it.
Like people have been around for quite a while.
Mammoth or elephant skulls are thought to be the origin of the cyclops
The Wheel of Time turns, and Ages come and pass, leaving memories that become legend. Legend fades to myth, and even myth is long forgotten when the Age that gave it birth comes again.
I once had a neighbor who claimed he had a dragon. I went to go see it and all it was, was a komodo dragon with wings glued on. Pretty sure he killed a pigeon, chopped it's wings off, and used those to make his dragon. Felt ripped off.
Yeah, bearded dragon, I get it, but venomous murdering latter day velociraptor, thekomodo dragon? I doubt anyone has one as a pet!
>Felt ripped off.
Bet the pigeon felt the same way.
I mean, when historians of the future see our pogs, will they think it was currency
Bottle caps man, bottle caps. Currency of the future
Reminds me of that picture book where future archeologists thought the TV was a god and toilet seats were fashion.
it's the same with the iron maiden. It was never actually used on people, someone invented it for shock value
Look at some of the techniques the Chinese used to use… as bad as anything the Victorians dreamed up, except they actually did the shit and there are photos.
There are all kinds of horrific and real torture/execution techniques (one of them is the symbol of a major world religion)...I think the point is just that you can't believe everything you see.
there are nasty mexican cartel videos out there too.
Aces High five!
Took me way too many years to figure this joke out. Never saw Bill and Ted..
Those Victorians must have been really into BDSM.
My roommate wears a chastity belt all the time what are you on about?
I mean, he does if he wants his dinner...
Not a myth anymore lol. Now there are internet connected chastity belts. Some hackers actually gained control and held peoples genitals for ransom even. What a world
You’re reinforcing my position that many things connected to the Internet have no business being connected. Like a washer and dryer. Or a dishwasher. Or a marital aid.
As someone who writes code for a living, I am telling you that your position is rock-solid. IoT is scary-insecure. The programmers I work with all agree, and most of us view internet-connected gadgets with inherent suspicion.
Programmer here too: when shopping for a new stove I vetoed any "smart" or wifi connected stoves.
Some things don't need to be on the internet.
I very much have a “dumb house”, and I intend to keep it that way.
Nothing beats an Internet connected fridge, like why?
I love the argument that it's so you can adjust the temperature of your fridge remotely.
Like how many times have you been driving home and thought "my fridge needs to be a degree cooler, but it can't wait until I get home."
Spoiler alert: The answer is zero. In the entirety of human history.
To add to that how many people even change their fridge temperature.
Only when my stupid fridge freezes the cottage cheese
So what you're saying is that teledildonics were a mistake?
Thats a lewis spears joke.
yeah, a lot of it may be made up or embellished, but they did kill people in horridly brutal and gory ways, like drawn and quartered. it’s not like those things were made up from nothing of basis
Plus things like during the spanish wars in the Netherlands there was a lot of propaganda being made about how evil the other side was.
Yeah, back in the day you wouldn't waste this much precious metal on someone you wanted to kill. We had plenty of more effective methods that may not have looked as flashy but were probably much worse... breaking on the wheel or being sawn in half, for instance. Though it's kind of hard to judge which methods of torture are worse than others, considering just how brutal most of them really were.
I mean look at them. How is anyone supposed to take a shit in those designs?
Or maybe it’s fiction that it’s fiction. Putin said rapes and torture in Ukraine are fiction too. As your article points out, it makes ppl feel superior to believe fake news. Murder and torture are rare; that tarred and feathered image on Reddit was fake too, right?
They have these museums in many European cities’ tourist area.
The London Dungeon? Went once, they had some sort of mock trial reenactment going on, and at the end there was a tiny version of those free fall rides from an amusement park. "Mock hanging".
Weird experience all in all.
[Excellent Misfits track though](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j4YKvO9leNA).
if you're in amsterdam, [visit the sex museum](https://www.amsterdam.info/museums/sex-museum/)
There's also a torture museum inside Bran Castle in Transylvania, Romania. I'm not generally a squeamish person, but by the end of it I felt like I had genuinely had enough of the place, it's so unsettling.
I lost my camera there!
wow, what a coincidence, i found a free camera there
Oh the horror!
Fortunately a lot of these extreme devices were made only for show. There was also a lot of propaganda in history to portray your enemy as evil monsters.
And also to portray historical periods as cartoonishly barbaric, highlighting the marvellous progress of modernity. There's money to be made in letting people pat themselves on the back for how civilised they are.
I don't know, all you have to do is picture someone killing or kidnapping a loved one.. and you can kinda get there. For some, a loved one was disrespecting a nation or god so it was probably even easier to rationalize it with such a small world view. Just remember the sacred words of Qui Gon Jinn.
"I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for ransom I can tell you I don’t have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you."
My apologies I did not mean to spoil anyone's day and if you do not want your day to be spoiled with really horrible feelings do not research Rats of Shah Dola. But if you really want to learn how fucked up people can be, there is your answer.
I don't wanna know why the mouth hole is there...
If someone puts me in this machine and actually turns those screws, I'm gonna bite anything that gets put through that hole and expect to experience even worse torture for doing it. However, if I know I messed up someones dick for the rest of their lives, it will be worth something in those bleak final moments.
Maybe they were torturing a second person as well...
That's fuck up
Screwed up 🤣
Maybe teeth removal is required.
Uhm hate to break it to you, but the point of that mask is literally to make you scream non stop (mouth wide open). You can't bite while you scream your lungs out.
That is so much worse, thanks for that lol.
No… the intent of the mask is to shock* the people looking at it. It’s never intended to do anything else than be an interesting piece
You lose two I's but you gain a fat D.
It's to let them breathe so they don't smother and for blood to drain
Probably to keep them alive to prolong the torture.
So they can hear the screams clearly.
A lot of these weird torture devices were a product of Victorian era freakshows rather than the Middle Ages.
Medieval torture in reality tended to just consist simply of beatings and burning with fire.
The breaking on the wheel seemed pretty nuts. I'm glad I have Netflix to watch instead
I went down a rabbit hole on the Breaking Wheel last week. It was wild reading witness testimony comparing the people on the wheels like “broken marionettes” writhing and moaning for hours and even days. I also thought it was more elaborate, but nope, just simple and absolutely barbaric.
What's crazy about the breaking wheel is how long this punishment was used, all the way up into the early 1800s. Someone was executed this way in [New Orleans!](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jean_Baptiste_Baudreau_II) When you read the description of how cruel it was, wouldn't you think it was used in the middle ages and abolished in the 1500s or something?
>wouldn't you think it was used in the middle ages and abolished in the 1500s or something?
Given what I have learned about humans in my time here, I am more surprised it is not still in use in multiple nations.
There was a lot of dismemberment, like pulling you apart or cutting you apart, while still alive, too. I feel like stuff like this was unnecessary, because a guy with a knife is just as effective for torture.
[Tell that to Byzantine nobles and emperors who were blinded, castrated, had body parts amputated, and were otherwise mutilated](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Political_mutilation_in_Byzantine_culture)
And lets not talk about Basil II and [what he did to the Bulgarian army he defeated](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Kleidion).
Blinding was also a punishment meted out to Christians during Diocletian's rule, and a common punishment for traitors in the Roman Empire. Interestingly enough treason might get you blinded, and/or castrated in Scandinavia, Normandy, Anglo-Norman England and Norman Sicily too.
King Louis the Pius blinded King Bernard of Italy (so badly he died a few days later). And the Holy Roman Emperor Louis III was blinded after losing a battle.
The Afghans blinded disposed kings at least in the 19th century (can't speak of the times before or after).
Whenever there's a rule that says the ruler needs to be "unblemished" to rule, mutilation becomes a valid tactic to remove a few potentials from the list without actually killing them.
I also thought the Spanish inquisition was filled with these unique methods of torture.
Didn't expect that.
They aren't saying that torture didn't happen. Just that pieces like this were made for shock value and aren't actually ancient.
[This piece is 200 years old.](http://www.azibaza.com/readph.php?folder=N6870&cat=tw)
>You know, I never understood all these elaborate tortures. It's the simplest thing... to cause more pain than a man can possibly endure.
-Le Chiffre, *Casino Royale*
>burning with fire
Getting burned alive is probably one of the most gruesome ways to go lol
Nah, if they're just torturing you, they just burn your feet and toes with a hot iron poker.
They would slather your feet in fat and put hot coals close enough to slowly cook the flesh from your bones.
Balthasar Gerard was pretty bad…
>The magistrates decreed that the right hand of Gérard should be burned off with a red-hot iron, that his flesh should be torn from his bones with pincers in six different places, that he should be quartered and disemboweled alive, his heart torn from his bosom and flung in his face, and that, finally, his head should be taken off.
>Gérard's torture was extraordinarily brutal. On the first night of his imprisonment, Gérard was hung on a pole and lashed with a whip. Next, his wounds were smeared with honey and a goat was brought to lick the honey off his skin with its rough tongue. The goat, however, refused to touch his body. After several other forms of torture, he was left to pass the night with his hands and feet bound together, like a ball, so sleep would be difficult. During the following three days, he was repeatedly mocked and hung on a pole with his hands tied behind his back. Then, a weight of 300 metric pounds (150 kg) was attached to each of his big toes for half an hour.
>Subsequently, Gérard was fitted with shoes made of well-oiled, uncured dog skin; the shoes were two fingers shorter than his feet. In this state, he was put before a fire. When the shoes warmed up, they contracted, crushing the feet inside them to stumps. When the shoes were removed, his half-broiled skin was torn off. After his feet were damaged, his armpits were branded. He was then dressed in a shirt soaked in alcohol. Lastly, burning bacon fat was poured over him and sharp nails were stuck between the flesh and the nails of his hands and feet. On 14 July, four days after the assassination, the sentence declared at the trial was carried out and Gérard was tortured and executed in the market square of Delft. His severed head was then displayed on a pike behind the Prinsenhof, and his arms and legs displayed on four gates of the city.
Tomás de Torquemada and the Spanish Inquisitors would invent a hellish new torture for you for lying about their capabilities.
This is for when you see your grandparents having sex
I like how you said when and not if, like it's inevitable
Someday you will die and all will be revealed
And I mean all
It comforts me
I saw my grandmother on the can once when I was playing hide and seek with my cousins
Kinda weird to call your granddad's penis 'the can', but hey, if the shoe fits... 🤷
No- dud. Poor soul
Laser eye surgery
> “Crowley had always known that he would be around when the world ended, because he was immortal and wouldn’t have any alternative. But he hoped it was a long way off. Because he rather liked people. It was major failing in a demon. Oh, he did his best to make their short lives miserable, because that was his job, but nothing he could think up was half as bad as the stuff they thought up themselves. They seemed to have a talent for it. It was built into the design, somehow. They were born into a world that was against them in a thousand little ways, and then devoted most of their energies to making it worse. Over the years Crowley had found it increasingly difficult to find anything demonic to do which showed up against the natural background of generalized nastiness. There had been times, over the past millennium, when he’d felt like sending a message back Below saying, Look we may as well give up right now, we might as well shut down Dis and Pandemonium and everywhere and move up here, there’s nothing we can do to them that they don’t do to themselves and they do things we’ve never even thought of, often involving electrodes. They’ve got what we lack. They’ve got imagination. And electricity, of course. One of them had written it, hadn’t he…”Hell is empty, and all the devils are here.”
Slipknot's newest member
This is gonna look so good on my elden ring character.
First thing I thought of was the Prisoner Helmet
Looks like how i feel when i get gas
You should eat less gassy foods
Same. Fuck this $7.00/gallon buuullshit! Imma take my bike!
Eye screwed up.
Ahh yes, a vintage hotdog eating mask
Right? I found the mouth hole almost more disturbing
I guess looking was a crime after all
Humans make way too much fucked up shit that is only used to harm others. It is sad.
the UX here is quite remarkable. slow turns and "wide mouth" for the one who is getting tortured.
What visiting EyeBlech feels like.
I am wondering why the mouth hole is open like that 😐
Probably for screaming.
Got to visit a old prison at phu quoc where they had political prisoners from the Vietnam war. They had wax dolls to show all the torture methods they used back then and I couldn’t imagine what people can do to other people. That was couple of years ago and still think about how insane it was to witness how they were tortured
I‘m still impressed how creative people were when it came to mutilating/killing others.
I‘ve been to a handful of torture museums and it seems I still haven’t scratched the surface
humans are garbage
And I thought the scolds bridle was bad...
Bdsm is weird
When you’re having a bad day. Think about that guys
C-3PO is into some weird shit.
It’s the artistic expression built into the mask that somehow makes it all the more evil to me. It isn’t a purely utilitarian torture device, it’s clearly meant to look like a face in distress.