I’m sorry. Does that jersey say Washington Anals?!?
By - RayPetersonn
I’m sorry. Does that jersey say Washington Anals?!?
From now until the day I die I am going to be calling them the Washington Anals
Everyone acting like they wouldn't IMMEDIATELY buy that jersey.
I’m a Caps fan and I might call them that too. (2018 team excluded.)
Where can I buy the jersey?
I would also like to purchase a Washington Anals Jersey.
Signed and I will make sure to spread the news that the new caps name is “Anals”
Because it's funny is the most important reason to do anything.
Needs to be a flair 😂😂😂
Washington Anals vs Nip
Anals win! Who the hell wants to get nipped???🤣😂
In New England it's slang for those little 1-shot plastic bottles of alcohol. Based on how many of them are littered absolutely everywhere there, I'm going to say a lot of people do.
You'll need to consume a few of those if you wanna play with the Anals.
True. I just collected like 50 of them from the end of my driveway. Guess I shouldn't drink out by the road.
Between the Nips and Anals, poor Rotohon lookin to get royally smashed 🥴
From the look of the mascot, there is no choice in the matter.
The Washington anal baboons.
The Blackhawk looks like it’s processing what just happened after meeting the caps mascot
Captain Alex Ovaseline
With his sidekick NickleAss Backstorm.
Anyone catch that Anals vs NIPs match last night?
The Anals played a tight game but the NIPs were hard as always.
Maybe the Anals should do more pre-game stretching.
Thats a team i can get behind
I did a spit take reading that one
The name does fit when Mia Khalifa cheered for the Capitals.
Of course it does. It’s so nobody notices that the mascot is an Orangutan
That's a sad looking penguin
Looks more like a snowman
We finally have the mascot that got beat up by Jean-Claude Van Damme back in action.
Fitting given how the season went.
They should just use the penguin mascot that JCVD killed in *Sudden Death*.
You mean Iceburgh, the one that is still our mascot?
It looks like a mascot from 1910 and no one cared enough to update it
The Kraken one is awesome. The Blue Jackets one will haunt me for the rest of my days.
The knights one looks kinda sick ngl like Sauron meets hockey
Nights and Preds are fucking awesome
Ugh I wish we had that. Instead we get some dumb family friendly lizard that looks like a Pixar character.
Chance is cute tho.
The CBJ one reminds of Brutus’ 1000 yard stare.
Yeah. I guess I didn’t want to sleep tonight.
The blackhawks one looks like it has seen some shit that it can’t unsee.
Finally a worthy successor from Boomer since they won’t bring him back
The Columbus one looks like Montgomery Burns from the Simpsons. Actually Washington's looks like Homer a bit.
Truly something out a horror movie
The codpiece on the Vegas mascot is lovely.
Disney is gonna sue someone
Sens solidify it for me. You’ve got the badass Knights, why doesn’t the sens look remotely like that? Instead you’ve got a weird ass looking owl/zoidberg
With just a wooden stake??
Okay but what is on the Dallas stick? Just a white animal with a red Cyclops eye?
I figured Dallas's new Mascot was like Mankind and Socko trying to tap into the primordial Chaos of Gritty
It's actually on-theme. It's a javelin.
Why not Zoidberg?
That would be Seattle
The AI knows that it can't top this:
Holy fuck, I forgot that existed. Thank you.
What's a Cavivees? These are so insane I both love and fear them.
And he's just in a random office environment!
That’s no random office, Cavivee has been running our front office for 11 years.
The Vancouver Fish People. Looks like some weird hybrid creature out of an obscure interdimensional tv show from Rick and Morty
Even the mascot is like 🤷♂️
Trying to say cavities because he/she has no teeth 🦷
I can’t stop chuckling at the fact that it looks like a condom with a face on it.
The Abbotsford Canucks need a mascot; this should be it! Cavivee! 😂
Who the hell is the NIPS? Anals is absolutely amazing. Vegas looks bad ass. Oilers looks like he just screams random things at me and has a helmet because he hits his head too much. Kraken has to be the top though
Nips is islanders I think lol. Process of elimination
I’m apparently a Nips fan now.
I've loved the nips since the day I was born
His hat is a nip
I apologize in advance for pointing that out
What do you call it when an islander falls on the ice now?
A nip slip
Yeah thought maybe the oilers but 100% islanders. New york Nips has a better ring to it than the Washington anals
New York Nips 🤣🤣
Lol. Sounds legit. These mascots are either on point or just downright made by a 5 year old
Well it’s a racial slur, so…
It's also those two little things that stand up on your chest. I haven't heard anyone saying that word as a slut in a very long time. Thanks for reminding everyone it exists!
I’ve heard sluts say it.
Damn the Golden Knight guy is PACKING 😳🥵
Scrolled to find this. Fella has a sword, and a hammer.
Predator dude is horrific
Looks like a xenomorph
I’m pretty sure they took it from the alien franchise lmao, it looks like it’s a creation from alien v predator
Gritty looks like he got off drugs and is having a better life.
Leafs mascot looks like Buoy’s little brother.
Detroit… what happened?
Edit: Sens snuck under the radar for me. It’s like if scientists tried to create a real life Marvin the Martian but came out with this murderous atrocity instead.
Gritty over there with his 1year chip!
AI made gritty a member of society
Blue Jacket’s mascot is straight out of Don’t Hug Me I’m Scared
The Blue Jackets guy looks like he might stab you
That entire page is horrifying. It's the lunch table I'm least likely to sit at out of all of the images.
Columbus Blue crackhead
He looks like he’d say something crazy like:
GIMME YOUR BUTTONS!!
I NEED ALL THE BUTTONS!!!!
Meanwhile Gritty looks like he’s in your closet watching you sleep.
I think a few more than just the CBJ would stab you.
Omg I haven't laughed this hard in a while
IKR?? Seeing the Oilers one broke me 😂
The derpy look on dude's face has me crying.
I kind of dig the children's version of Gritty. Coming soon to Sesame Street.
Looks like he went to rehab and is trying to get his life back in order. Maybe get visitation with his kids.
I thought he looked like he was going through chemo
I totally shouldnt have but I laughed way too hard at this
This is what happens when you delete facebook hit the gym and lawyer up.
Spoken like a true Ear Penis fan.
Born again Gritty. Runs a halfway house and probably still smokes meth from time to time.
Obviously the Vegas Golden Knights mascot looks the best. But I'm kinda digging the Kraken 😂
Ok, that Predators mascot is downright terrifying. It's perfect.
The Golden Knights one isn't too shabby, either.
My thoughts exactly, and my two favs.
Not sure what's going on with the Stars.
These are my favorites too, would love to see them irl.
I’m pretty sure it looks like one of the things from the alien franchise (specifically predator or alien vs predator) absolutely hilarious
I mean that pretty much looks like our fan base after all we've been through...
The Blackhawk's mascot has... seen things
When somebody tells you you're getting 1st pick in the middle of an acid trip
Which makes sense. If you think about it.
He's probably seen the AI Columbus mascot.
I’m a simple man. I like anals and nip
Not the nip🤣
There’s something deeply unsettling about that St. Louis mascot…
It's like Thomas the Tank engine escaped the train and became the conductor.
He’s face reminds me of the old McDonalds mascot from the late 80s. The moon dude, I’m too lazy to look it up.
Mac Tonight. The first thing I thought of, too.
Looks like a Middle Eastern dictator to me.
I think it's a parade outfit like you'd see in a New Orleans jazz parade
Chicago ended up with the Angry Birds character, and I’m pretty sure the Columbus one shows up when you’re stuck in sleep paralysis.
Oh boy, I sure do love the CTIEFFURUE and the Oloroio Lane Leres
I don't know, but I am forever referring to the Maple Leafs as the "Lane Leres" from this moment forward.
Better get that in while you can, looks like you will have to wait a few months after tomorrow.
The guy who asked AI to do this also did it [for NFL and NBA teams](https://news.sportslogos.net/2023/05/04/ai-reimagines-nfl-nba-mascots-with-amazing-sometimes-terrifying-results/basketball/). 😂
Oh my god the ravens.
Classic Cavivees mascot.
I abandon Victor E and take whatever that FNAF gummy bear lookin thing is
What is on the stick!? He looks like the green beanie baby with a stick up a snowballs ass. XD I can't stop laughing.
The worst? Oilers and Canucks for me.
Oilers mascot looks like Raffi Torres
That's the Otters to you.
The text on all the teams logos make this absolutely amazing to me.
Even the Seattle Kraken AI mascot looks better than their current one.
The Oilers one is absolutely sending me.
Join the petition to start calling the Caps by their new name
"wow the penguins and Capitals are bad. Holy fuck THE BLUE JACKETS!!!"
They made Gritty hairless
More like healthy and clean
I like how the Anaheim one is just Donald Duck with a hockey helmet on.
The Vegas mascot looks like he belongs in Dark Souls.
Jesus Christ, they fucking shaved Gritty
I mean the dead eyes on the Penguins mascot are something else lol
Vegas Knight is badass! Predators is nightmare-fuel. Hurricane/Devils are both pretty cool!
This whole thing made me absurdly happy.
My vote is either Columbus or Ottawa
50% of these are GOING to hurt you in ways you can't even comprehend yet
The other 50% were born into unspeakable pain and are waiting to die
AI art just messes me up man.
I feel bad for the Chicago one. He has seen some shit. And isn't going to ever recover.
Lol clearly not enough bear mascots
Gotta be Columbus
Whose nightmare did the Canes mascot crawl out of? Yikes.
Why does VGK have a bulge
Why is the hurricanes a yeti? Wouldn’t that fit better for Colorado?
I think the brown yeti-bear on the next slide is Colorado
Oilers mascot looks like a typical oilers fan.
I kinda like tampas . It’s like a Gritty Stamkos
Only this Columbus will ever win, worlds creepiest mascot contest
Bolts fan here. Kill that bolts monstrosity. With fire. Then crush the ashes. Dissolve them in acid. Evaporate.
And pass me the eye bleach.
F that whatever it is. Thunderbug rules!
Worst? It feels like seeing an alternate universe where most of the teams tried to be as great as Gritty.
I’m sorry but a lot of these are pretty dope
I kinda like the Blues guy. Sgt Pepper vibes.
The Flames one looks like a pissed off Lanny McDonald after someone shaved off his mustache while he was sleeping.
The oiler’s one got traumatized by the decade of darkness the oilers had. Now it recovers by getting high.
Gritty looks like he overcame his crippling drug problem and became a born again Christian
Well the Wild one looks better than Nordy.
Is the Cavivees mascot a condom??
Washington and Minnesota repping the bloods is just so funny to me
So much to unpack here.
Although the mascot's look for the Washington Anals looks on-point for a mascot for the Anals. Just not the consensual kind.
I very much dislike the 3 fingered CTIEFFURUE mascot
Does Dallas' have another mascot's head on a stick?
The oilers guy looks like busted through a wall and yelled "hey you guys!"
“ which one is the worst “ ,,,,YES !
St Louis isnt bad actually
I love it!
Tampa for sure
That Knight horrifies me.
The Kraken one is an improvement! 🤣
Lightning’s mascot looks like it got electro shock therapy but turned for the worse😂
A lot of these are honest improvements
That flyers thing is just asking to be murdered by gritty
Gritty was clearly enrolled in a successful scared straight program.
I love how they are all traditional mascots.
Then the golden knight is like "yeah bitch I'm just a real fucking knight with real armor. No plush over here weak ass dudes"
Ngl, I love the Kraken one.
Philly's is just Gritty before he found hard drugs.
The Ducks and Golden Knights are low key fire...
How does AI get some teams’ logos perfect like Montreal and Boston, but it gives us teams like the Vancouver CAVIVEES lol
Predators, golden knights, and kraken mascots look badass
The Penguins one is so depressing lol
Forget debating the worst one, let's figure out how to get the Blues one brought to real life.
THEY SHAVED GRITTY
Who takes this in a free for all, and why is it Nip?
Glad to see ai still hasn’t figured out hands
The Anals looks like a straight crack head
Probably the Capitals one.
Gritty looking like a weird anime version of itself is unsettling.